Where am I at right now?

Truthfully, I feel stretched thin, ragged, and ready to just turn it in and hide for a while. My second little boy is due in early September and I've been riding the razor's edge near physical and mental burnout since well before April.

See, we found out we were pregnant on New Year's Eve. This kiddo was prayed for and hoped for through loss and heartache for nearly two years. Finding out was a massive surprise and the best start to the new year we ever could have asked for. But with the excitement also came stress. What if we experienced another loss? What if we went to another ultrasound appointment and didn't see a heartbeat? What if things didn't go well? What if? I feel like I've been holding my breath all year waiting for something to go wrong and I know…

Y’all if I might be so bold to ask, I need some advice. Any input would be helpful at this point.

A little while ago back in November, I bought my first car, a 2019 Infiniti Q50 Luxe. Ever since I bought it, it’s given me nothing but issues. Let’s go down the line of what has gone wrong thus far. First, I got a flat tire (Rear driver side) but luckily the tires are run flat, so I could get it back home. Once I got new rear tires, my rear bumper cover flew off on the highway and I still haven’t been able to replace it yet. Next a few months later, I was driving in the rain and my front tires lost traction around a corner so I went straight into a curb, smashing my upper and lower oil pan as well as my oil pump whil…

No, I'm not talking about from the Sun, I'm talking about the "Ahhh man, I gotta wash the f*cking truck again" and the "Why do I do this sh*t" time of year.

Well it's that time of year again. We've reached the point where I am sweating out of every orifice of my body trying to get the ride ready for the 3rd meet of the week, after work, dad and husband duties, as I drop another 10mm socket into the Abyss of broken dreams and think of selling my stuff and buying a nice sensible car.

I'm sure we all reach this point, but what keeps us going back to the abuse, like Tina to Ike? I'll explain....well, at least why I do, and how I keep mustering up the strength to push on and wash and wax the bitch, one more time. This summer has been a lot…

So been waiting almost 3 months for my custom vertex bumper to be finished and painted.. painter is dragging his feet but can’t say much because he’s doing it for free along with my new widebody fenders.. but damn 🥲 he’s had my bumper almost 3 weeks. Keeps telling me the end of this week.. well we’re coming up on 4 weeks and now it’s Monday he will get to them with my fenders. I have a show in 8 days I thought I’d be more than prepared for and finished with paint. But uhhh.. 😬 just loosing steam on the car. I thought I’d make it into one showcase with her this year but not looking like it. None of my friends care about this kind of thing, it’s all hair and nails for them so they don’t understand the disappointment I have for not only myself but my…